A first toy does not have to be complicated or expensive. Three questions are enough: what kind of sensation you are interested in, whether it is for you or for two, and what it is made of. Below we go through how to choose without rushing and without guessing.
If you are still unsure, start with the questions worth asking before you buy, and for lubricant see How to choose a lubricant.
In brief
- For a start, people usually take a simple single-motor toy: it is easy to control and costs less.
- Choose a material that does not absorb moisture: silicone, ABS plastic or stainless steel.
- For a silicone toy, use a water-based lubricant.
- Price does not guarantee quality: a higher price does not mean a better fit for you.
Three questions before you choose
- What kind of stimulation interests you? External, internal or both at once: the shape depends on it.
- For you or for two? If you plan to use it with a partner, talk it through beforehand and follow the hygiene rules below.
- What is the budget? You do not have to buy the most expensive model first: you can change the toy once you know what you like.
Types of toys to start with
| Type | What it is for | What to look at |
|---|---|---|
| External (small vibrators, mini vibrators) | External stimulation, no insertion | The shape is not necessarily cylindrical: it should sit comfortably in the hand |
| Internal | Insertion, stimulation of internal areas, including the G-spot | Usually long and cylindrical; pay attention to the diameter |
| Combined (“rabbit”) | Internal and external stimulation at the same time | Some have two motors that are controlled separately |
| Anal | Anal stimulation | Always with a flared base, so the toy cannot slip inside |
| Vibrating rings | Extra stimulation during sex or masturbation | Check the size and the way it is controlled |
Material: what to look for on the product page
The most common choice for a start is silicone. It is soft, does not absorb moisture and washes well. ABS plastic and stainless steel are also considered body-safe. Porous materials (jelly, PVC, TPE, TPR, silicone blends) can hold dirt even after washing, so a condom is used with such toys.
The material is listed in the product details, and the manufacturer's instructions have the final word.
Size and controls
- Size. Internal toys range from about one to five fingers in width. External ones range from small (about 8 cm) to large massagers.
- Modes. Constant vibration is on almost all models; pulse patterns are on some. Simple controls are enough for a start.
- Other. Check the power source, water protection and noise level on the product page rather than guessing.
How to start
- Read the instructions and learn what each button does.
- Start with the lowest intensity.
- Use a water-based lubricant if the toy is silicone.
- After use, wash the toy and dry it well; store it in a soft pouch.
Safety limits
Wash the toy with warm water and mild soap before and after every use. If two people use it, put a clean condom on for each person or wash it between users. Before moving a toy from anal to vaginal use, wash it or change the condom. If pain, irritation or any other problem appears, stop and see a doctor. If an anal toy stays inside and cannot be removed, medical help is needed. This article is informational and does not replace a consultation.
Frequently asked questions
What is the best toy to start with?
Usually a simple, affordable single-motor toy made of a body-safe material. Choose the type by the kind of stimulation you want to try.
Do I have to buy an expensive toy?
No. Price does not guarantee quality, and for a first toy there is no need to choose the highest price.
Which material is safer?
Silicone, ABS plastic and stainless steel do not absorb moisture and wash more easily. Porous materials can hold dirt, so a condom is used with them.
Which lubricant should I choose?
Water-based lubricant suits silicone toys. Silicone lubricant can damage the surface. More here: which lubricant suits silicone toys.
Can I share a toy?
It is better not to. If you do, wash it between users or put a new condom on for each person.
